Wednesday, December 17, 2008

vision, finals, home

so i havent been here in a while
but i have a perfectly good reason:
I HAVE BEEN STUPID BUSY!!!!!
i dont know about anyone else but it has been a hectic last few weeks
i had vision night on December 7th, which is where i got introduced to the congregation of the church as the new senior high youth pastor.
I also got pizza rubbed in my hair and my neck and my shoulders......
i wont say anything else
i had finals: which is where i spent most of a good three days in front of a computer screens typing about 25 pages of papers that were due in a matter of two days
that was just dumb.
now i am home, and i came home on an interesting weekend because i came home to a house without power from an ice storm that hit my area a few days before i got home.
So now i am at home and i am enjoying it
relaxing
missing my beautiful fiance
seeing old friends
its a good time
so i will hopefully get on track to start typing some more

sorry friends

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

listen to the wind......

Today while i was in chapel i listened to one of the most talented and amazing preachers i have ever listened to
Dr. Robert Lowery of Lincoln Christian Seminary.
Dr. Lowery has had more life experiences, good and bad, than most people.

He preached on something that is very hard to understand sometimes.
John 3:8 says this " The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the spirit."
this message is very hard to understand
Dr. Lowery was able to put in terms that everyone was able to understand.

The part that really pissed me off about this sermon was that, i wanted to say the same thing this past week at youth group.
I searched and searched for this verse and i couldnt remember where it was for the life of me.
I think that God has a a way of blowing the wind in the direction that we are going to go.

I have lived a life that has been back and forth, and up and down. I dont know when exactly i first felt the wind blow in my life, but i have a few examples.

When i was in high school, i went to many parties and did things that i probably should not have done. When i decided to give my life to ministry, the first step and the first time i felt the wind in my life was when i gave up that life to start a new one. I felt the wind blow
When i was in college i got one of the best experiences of my life by two internship summers that i was able to connect with students, and adults and mentors that i still have to this day. I felt the wind move in my life then when the wind blew to where God wanted me to go.
I have found someone in my life that makes me happier than she will ever know. I love her more than anyone i could on this earth. The wind blew to her
I have now received an opportunity that will lead me to where i will be in the next ten years of my life. The wind is blowing

In my life the wind has blown, and blew and is blowing. Guiding me where i may go in life, guiding me to the one i love and want to spend the rest of my life with, and guiding me in my walk with Jesus.

The wind is a powerful thing, it can blow you to places that you did not expect. It can give you a life experience that you may have never thought that you would ever get to do in your life.

Listen to the wind, watch it move the branches, watch it move and change lives.

Where has the wind blown in your life?

Sunday, November 9, 2008

what does it mean to have pure Joy?

so, Pure Joy. What does that even mean?
Is it when you are captivated by something?
Or maybe its when you are apart of something that brings you so much happiness that you cannot even contain it?
Or maybe it could be when you first allow yourself to be truly loved and cared for.
What about when something bad happens, but in the long run it brought you joy for it came out good? is that considered pure Joy?
I wonder if being a Christian is pure Joy? I mean think about it. You are following after someone that you cant see, hear, touch, or feel. Can he bring you pure Joy?
what about sin? I feel like sin can bring many people pure Joy? It might not always come in the right way or it might not always be right. But doesn't it bring pure Joy to some?
How is pure joy defined in life? Is it different for every person? Or can than be one thing that can bring everybody pure joy into there lives?
Money? Love? Sex? Music? Alcohol? Drugs?

OK...
before you go start spreading a rumor about me questioning my faith, or thinking that i am this depressed person. That is not true. I have been thinking for the past few days on what in life can bring someone pure joy. What can make someone so happy that it can change their outlook on life or how they live their life. There are few things that I have come up with. 1) Joy is something that is found in all different ways and when found in the right way, it is one of the most satisfying things you will ever find in your life. 2) Joy can change someone. In every aspect of their life, joy can change someones attitude, dress, fun capability, everything in their life can change. 3) Joy is not something that lasts for 2 seconds and then is gone. Joy is something that is lasting and makes a lasting impact on your life. 4) Joy can lead to you being one of the best witnesses for Christ that you can be. I say that because not only when someone is happy and joyful, it is seen, people start to ask questions. And when you answer with something that has to do with your faith, or with you believing in Jesus. That sparks thought in other peoples mind. 5) There is no one thing that can bring everyone joy. Except for one thing... Believing in Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. 6) I don't know if i contradicted myself in that last point or not. 7) Joy can be found many different ways.

So what brings me Joy:
on a personal level: My Lord and Savior, and how much he impacts my life. Another is the relationship i have with my fiance. I don't think that i would be the person that i am today, without her in my life.
Ministry drives my life. It may not always make me happy all the time, but when i get to see a teenager being baptized, or confessing something, or just coming to the realization of something in their life. I love being with teens when they make decisions for their life, or when they are asking questions. I just love being with teens and guiding them along in life.
Another thing that brings me joy is sports. I always joke around with people that i want to be playing golf when i am 95 years old. I don't know how many of them take me seriously, but i will tell you this, Sports, especially Golf, brings me joy every time i indulge in them. Golf is one of the most fun things that i do in my life, and i will never let that up.

So i hope i cleared up any thoughts that i am a depressive person, or i need sin to give me pure joy. Maybe you didn't even think that and that is a good thing.
What brings you pure joy?
Peace and Love
2 John v 4 " It has given me great JOY to find some of your children walking in the truth, just as the Father commanded us."
3 John v 4 " I have no greater Joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth."

Thursday, November 6, 2008

so what about politics

well we have a new president. Barack Obama
and thats really all i have to say about that.
Ill be honest, i did not follow the election that closely. I think that politics are very hard to get into because i usually hear bad crap about both parties. I hear very little good things about both party's. that kind of draws me away from the whole politic arguments.
I do want to say Good luck to our new president, and i hope that he does a good job in office.
But i will also say, that since i did not know enough about either candidates, and i did get my absentee ballot, i did not vote. If i did vote, i couldnt tell you who i would vote for. So i am not going to write about politics, just good luck to the new president.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

mcdonalds and a bus full of soccer players

So i have been playing soccer this season for my college
im not 100% sure on how many trips that we have been on, but it has been a lot
we are coming to the close of our season this week, as we get ready to go off to Michigan to play in our regional tournament
this trip is going to not only be fun, but it will be the last sport trip that i take in my college career
for some reason it doesnt seem to phase me, is that a a bad thing?
i dont know but i am ready for soccer to be over, not a bad way, but i am ready to spend more time working and getting ready for the life that i will be starting in May
the one thing that i will miss about soccer season is going to be the mcdonalds trip that we have had after the games
every time something rediculous seems to happen
like when the only girl that is on our team acciddently farted and now she has the nickname "thunder"
like i said Rediculous
any ways
soccer is coming to a close, and i have lost about 20 pounds
thats a pretty good time if you ask me

Friday, October 24, 2008

the drive went way left!

so i was thinking the other day about the sport of Golf.
Now for those of you who know me well, i love to play golf, it is definitely one of my favorite sports of all time.
I was thinking about how golf can teach us a lot about life, and it has a lot to with different aspects of life.
for example:
Patience: for those that have played golf, you know that if you do not have patience you will most likely never be able to play this game, because it is slow and really frustrating. Although, when I think about it, i had very little patience before i started playing golf. But as i continue playing, i can see how much more patient i am now. Now i dont want to say that I am amazingly patient, but i am learning and part of that is due to golf.
Concentration: there is no other way that i can think of, when it comes to how i have taught myself to concentrate more other than golf. Golf takes a lot of concentration and a lot of focus to play 18 holes. like patience, your concentration can go fast, and when that happens it can lead to getting frustrated and giving up. Concentration from golf, has helped me concentrate more on school, and concentrating on the things that are important to me.
Dedication: this is one of the big ones. my friend Ryne put it this way: " its the complete oppostie as riding a bike, you cant play on day and then expect to play just as good a month later". I think he is completely right when it comes to golf, you have to play golf a lot to get better at it. Golf is a game of repitiion and remember how to swing each club, and each shot. it takes a lot to be a great golfer. Tiger Woods, arguably the best golfer ever, hits about 1,000 golf balls a day, maybe more. Talk about dedication. I can get sick of golf by the time i am done with a round of 18. Life demands dedication. Dedication to school, family, friends, work, spouse, and most of all God. I think that through my love for Golf, i have learned to be more dedicated to my Lord and Savior, and the dedication i have has led me to want to grow deeper with my Relationship with him.
Fun: Golf is Fun. no doubt about it, maybe th game will get frustrating, but the game of golf is fun. you get three of your buddies and you go out to a course for 4 hours and you just have a blast. It slows you down, your friends down, and it allows you to enjoy life. I think there is few times that i have gone out with my father golfing, and have not enjoyed it. Usually the only time i dont enjoy it is when i am getting beat by him, but that doestn happen anymore, haha. I love golfing with my dad because we have so much fun together. It has helped my dad and i grow to where we are today and i wouldnt change that for anything.
those are probably the big three that Golf does for me.
I dont know about you, but sports can teach me a lot about life and how to deal with situations when they arise.
so next time you are playing any sport, stop take a minute, and think about a few things:
do you love playing this sport?
thank God for giving you the ability?
What could you learn from it?

Above all else, go out and have fun! Get out and enjoy Life!

Monday, October 13, 2008

does this call for break?

so the last few weeks have been ridiculous for me
i dont think i have been so tired, overwhelmed, and confused.....o wait i think i was some of those things this summer.
anyways, i have been in this battle with trying to decide where i am going to go after i am done with school in May
well it peaked this week
for some reason amanda and i are confused at how we have one offer that is almost undeniably amazing, and at the same time we have another offer that is undeniably amazing also. So we have been thrown for a loop because we just dont seem to know what God wants us to do. Which is hard since we are wanting to plan what we will be doing by the end of the month.
But i will say that we have 2 places that we are looking at hard
so hopefully soon, we will be able to make a choice on where we are going to go
so i have had school, work, soccer, wedding planning, internship, fiance, parents, friends, homework, studying, reading, a spiritial battle of somesort
so does this call for a break?

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

honesty and God

so what is it about good preaching, thoughts, and a prayer virgil that sparks thoughts in your head. maybe its the fact that you decide to pray for an hour, at 3 oclock in the morning.
I mean think about it, i will be praying and possibly sternly talking to God when some people will be getting up to start the day. Does that make any sense?

let me say this
for some reason even though i will be up late, i believe that there are some times in your life, that you need to be up late and talk to God.

tonight i herd a sermon, and the topic was how we need to be honest with God, and stop beating around the bush with him. I guess for some, it could seem like a pretty easy and straight forward topic. but for some reason it seemed to hit a nerve. not only does it seem like a lot of people i meet are not honest with God, it seems like they almost want to hide from what they are really thinking. why would people even want to do that because, lets just be honest, if God is who God really is, then doesn't he already know what you are thinking?
i guess i needed to hear that with what i have been thinking about
i have a lot on my mind right now:
internship
marriage
school
soccer
work
time
friends
bad moments

i just have so much on my mind and for some reason i need to just be honest with God
he knows what im thinking, but i need to be a man and go to him with honesty and humbleness and ask him what the heck is the deal right now?
so tonight when some of you are waking to start the day or those of you who may start the day after i go to sleep
pray for me
pray for yourself
pray for your friends, collegues, family
pray that they will all have honesty, and will have the courage and the guts to go to God and be honest, knowing that he is waiting for you to go and talk to him in an honest fashion, like a son to a father.
he is waiting
go be Honest with him

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

what is the purpose of blogging?

is there a strict purpose for blogging?

i guess i may not understand the idea of blogging

when i look at other person's blogs, people leave comments, they have a certain point of attack in their writing

but what is the point of a blog?

to just get there message out there?
to talk to other people?

i guess i just dont know
maybe someone can let me know so that i can start writing a more effective blog in a way
that people will read it more, or will talk back to me

let me know
peace out

Friday, September 12, 2008

?'s

here are some questions that i have been thinking about since i got back to school:

how do you know where God is calling you?
what is your earliest memory of God?
How is you spiritual life?
what is hardest for you to have a continual relationship with God?
what does it mean to be a real men of God?

those are some, some of them have come from one of my classes, but they have got me thinking
what are your answers?

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

kajmir and cigars

so its funny thinking about how long it has been since i have done this
but im gunna give it a try
again.....

a couple of weeks ago i was at a wedding of a very good friend of mine and we had his bachellor party at this ridiculous mansion that was in his hometown and let me tell you something that night was amazing

we had a lot of laughs, we had a cigar, we had something to drink, and well we had great conversation

some of the funnest conversation i have had in a while, it wasnt who i was with, or where we were, but it was the topic of discussion:

name an actor, and then think of his best and worst movies
that was it simple, easy

let me tell you though i didnt think that it would last untill 2 oclock in the morning we literally talked about actors and movies for like 3 hours
it was rediculous
but there is something to me about having those conversations because it makes me think about the fellowship that we had that night, it may not have been spiritual talk, or a bible study, or someone convicting someone else, it was a nice easy conversation that really brought us together as friends.

i think in some ways that is almost just as important sometimes than just talking spiritual all the time. not too say that i do not want to do those things because i do, but sometimes it is nice to just sit around a mansion and talk about movies( you dont really need the mansion though)

so i ask you this question
name one actor and tell me the best movie and the worst movie they have ever done.
peace out

Monday, September 8, 2008

so here is the reason

so for evans sake, i am going to let you in on a little secret:


my compter is broken! and i feel left out and unconnected to my friends elsewhere and it is sucking the big one!

so that is why i have not been bloggin as much as i wish i could
but hopefully tomorrow i will be receiving a computer that i can use until i hopefully get myself a macbook
love you all

peace love and fat albert
haha

Friday, August 22, 2008

travel=strange thoughts

so i finished my internship
it was amazing!
i dont think that i could ask for a better summer
but there is a weird thing that i had to go through again....
for some reason you hear people talk about how much you learn in college, and all the information you will need will come much when you are in college.
well let me tell you something, for some reason, i almost disagree
i think that you learn a lot, very much while you are in school
real ministry, is completely different than what you will learn in school. real ministry can only be learned when you are doing real ministry. its weird to think that how much knowledge that is being punched into our heads but it seems like i have learned this summer and last summer from doing ministry.
i have learned how to deal with situations that i dont want to be in, i have learned how much i love to preach, i have learned to connect with students that i could never think about connecting with, i have learned how to plan a huge outreach event, i was put in charge of a high school trip that i was not planned on being charge of, i had to comfort people for some interesting things, i have held more high schoolers why they cry for odd reasons,
it was an amazing summer of learning and of fun and crying
ill admit i cried like a little baby the night before i left
but there is some other interesting feelings, i have had them before but it is just different this time
for all that i want to be back at school, and how much i love being with my friends, and being back in the midwest to learn more
but for some reason the only thing that i can really think about, other than being sore out of my mind and my feat feeling like they want to explode, is going back to royersford PA, and be with that group of students thati fell in love with all over again this summer,
all i can think about is evan getting ready to make a decision to go to college,
i think about the girls and playing their sports and rocking it out at soccer
i think about little lauren going to florida sometime
i think about the rizzutos and how that big fat one made me actually cry and i love him very much for it
i think about darin and how much i miss him and how much i love him, i love you bro
everything in me is wanting to go back and see and be with everyone
but i know that God has brought me back here for a reason and i think it is to learn, and to gain as much knowledge as i can to go back to somewhere and bring the knowledge i learn to the students wherever i go.
i love everyone at CCV and i cant wait to hopefully return to royersford soon and for a long time
peace out

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

you just got punked!

so saturday night a friend and i decided to be mischievous.
we went into unwatered territory and went after someone who is so protective of his car, he probably doesn't like to get it wet for any reason.
we went after our friends silver honda civic, maybe its gray, i dont know but we went after it
we had 6 rolls of 200square feet of shrink wrap, so we debated for a little while at how much to use, we brought out half of the sticky wrap
we went to town we both took a full roll and started to run around the car covering the doors, the side mirrors, the windshield and the back window.
we covered the sucker, it was awesome
now we were about to get another roll, when we saw the door start to open, and little did we know, there were a couple of students that we both knew in the house along with the owner of the car. so we bolted out of there, and drove back to the hideout.
well at the hideout, i decided to hang out with my beautiful girlfriend for a little while, and in no less than 45 minutes, my partner comes and tells me " they got your car"
i was kind of perplexed and said "what do you mean they got my car"
"just come down and look at your car with me"
so i got up and my girlfriend and i followed my partner down to my car
and when i got outside i did not expect to see what i saw
MY CAR GOT POST IT NOTED!!
thousands, of post it notes, all over my car everywhere even my license plate got postit noted.
i was absolutely amazed when i first saw the car and job that was done i was incredibly................. taken back by how someone put that many post it notes on my car
after taking the post it notes off, not only did i start to think of who did, but i really wanted to congratulate the people who did it, as well as started to think of ideas that we can do to get them back.
i got punked!

Friday, August 1, 2008

second oppurtunuties

so here i am 9 weeks into an internship i never thought that i would have come last may
let me tell you something
it has been one of the greatest experiences of my life
i work with one of the most talented, and knowledgeable staffs i can think of in all the country
i have learned so much from my coach this summer that i dont think i would ever imagine of learning
i have worked with 4(thats for you alex) incredible interns that have been a blast to work with
i have developed a best friend relationship that i did not think i was going to develop
i have loved working with the students, and all the conversations and the questions, and even though some times were rough and some times were great, and some were right in the middle, all of it was worth it and i have enjoyed every minute of it.
i have grown to love the people here more and more every day by how they continue to welcome and love not only myself but my girlfriend also.
the people here are amazing and i would love to come back and continue doing life with them for a long time.
thank you so much for everyone here
for the oppurtunity, the love, the laughs, the community, the learning, the encouraging, the teaching, and just the experience
thank you so much

with love

Monday, July 21, 2008

the dark knight

so its sunday morning and thinking about what im going to do in the afternoon before i have to be up at the church for sunday night. adam, looks at me as i come walking through the office and says: "lets go at 1:20"
i was kind of perplexed at first but then i saw his computer screen up, and with fandango up on his screen i knew he wanted to go see the movie that i have been waiting for for so long

The Dark Knight.

This is the second instalment of the new Batman movie starring Christian Bale, Michael Caine, Heath Ledger, Aaron Eckhart, and some more huge names.

so i said yes of course, so we plan on going to see the movie at 1:20 sunday afternoon. let me tell you about how good this movie is. I love movies, all styles of movies and this is one of the best movies that i have ever seen. the camera work, the cinematography, the lighting, the colors, costumes, acting, everything was exceptional.
im obviously not going to spoil the movie for anyone who hasnt seen it yet, but there has been something going through my mind, since i went and watched this movie.

There is a real different vibe to the new batman movies rather than the old. i think one thing that stand out to me in this movie, is not how twisted and amazing it was, but how much the Joker reminded me of satan. it seems like everything that the joker did, and had people do seemed a lot like what satan does. he used his words to make people think what he wanted them to think and for them to do what he wanted them to do. the joker used words, and conundrums, to get people to do what he wanted them to do. he was able to make people believe in him and made them not want to get in his way but be apart of his crazy plans. the joker was a master of chaos in the movie, he was able to accomplish really everything that he wanted. i think the main thing that stuck me the most about the joker was how he just didnt care. i think thats another characteristic of satan that the joker had. he wasnt to worried about what people did as long as they, well did the wrong thing.

i saw this movie again over the weekend, and it was just as amazing or even better than the first. the joker still sparked thoughts at the similarities between satan and him.

the movie is excellent, a must see just throwing that out there

peace out.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

something that has been on my mind.......

you know there are just some things that stay on my mind all the time.......
the red sox
my family
school
job
all that typical stuff that usually someone is thinking about....
maybe not
but there is something that has been on my mind that has been there for a whle
a big event in my life
there comes a time in a everyone 's life where you have to take a step forward with your life and like it says in the Bible: "a man and a woman will become one flesh". now im not talking about having sex, but there is something else that comes before that. engagement.
its a weird thing to think about not only because you are making one of the largest commitments in your life, but you are thinking about spending the rest of your life with one other person. Its a scary thing to think about, but its something that i want to do. i have this girl in my life, she is pretty cool(sarcastic), shes gorgeous, smart, fun, easy to talk to, good listener, loves God, and even though we have our struggles, she captivates me. i will sometimes have it in my mind, you know that one thing about someone that makes you know that you want to marry him or her. i have almost all the time. but i think that i have finally figured out what it is, and i dont know if it something that i have gotten used to since we go to the same school, or have been spending the last two summers together. but i think that one thing, is that she is the person that always will run to me, whether she is pissed at me, at someone else, or just at life, she runs to me and it gives me that sense of love that i need a lot of the time from her, to let me know that she needs me. and likewise, i do that with her also.
so im pretty sure i have it, but here is the deal, now i just have to get over the hump, and get to the first big part of the relationship.
engagement.

Friday, July 11, 2008

stretch.............

so we had openeing day of stretch last night, and let me tell you i really didnt think that it was going ot happen.
the fact that i was runnning around in kevin stones truck at 5 oclock just a half hour before students were going to start showing up, it kind of freaked me out. I got a few phone calls from a friend of mine that was like we have a meeting in the auditorium get in here, and the fact that i had to tell him that i was not at the building was kind of funny to me.
but hey we had the first night and guess what?
we had the largest attendance yet over all the stretch's.
we had: over 200 students
it was amazing, for how i felt at 5 oclock, it was absolutely amazing
we had this dance company come called Chosen Dance company, dude they got here about 10 minutes before the service started and they were absoutely incredible. These guys have performed at the Superbowl, the X-Games, BET, America's Best Dance Crew on MTV, and many other spots. they were incredible, they came in and did a whole demo and lead a dance instruction class after the service. They were awesome.
The band, dude the band is awesome. this is definatley the best band that we have had at all the stretch's i have been apart of. The chemistry of Ben, Alex, Dom, Andy, and Glenn, we have a kick butt band. They did awesome. The whole music production team did a great job, at getting everything together and finishing.
The girls did an amazing job at getting the students pumped up and excited for the rest of the service. They did amazing.
Now we have this guy named Travis, he is our two year in a row speaker. Travis is pretty sweet, not only is he a pretty cool guy, he is also a great speaker. he is able to handle and control the most often noisy and unattentitive crowd that is junior highers. i am very excited that he is here again and that we get to hang out and listen to him again.
So then there were the Bubba Brothers, what else do i have to say.
Stretch was awesome, we had so many good leaders, and we all came together when we needed too.
Thank you so much for anyone that was here last night, and will be here the next two, because it is going to be awesome, and it will be amazing to watch as God is working in these junior high students lives.

thanks

Thursday, July 3, 2008

taming the tongue...

so i am writing a sermon on taming the tongue, and let me tell you it is kind o feye opening
i wish that i was better at this idea of taming my tongue. i dont think that i do a bad job, and its not like i go around swearing and badmouthing everyone. i just think there are sometimes that it seems like we as adults can fall into the same thing that some of our students can do. now the question would be for me, is whether or not we are being gossipy or wrong about just wanting to know about what is going on with our students lives?
i dont know what to think, because not only do i have friends in the youth ministry, but i feel like if i know what is going on in their lives, i am able to help them a little more, and hopefully give them a little more guidance if i know what they are going through.
as i write this sermon more and more, and think about it more and more, i want to be able to get across that i am not perfect and i do hold myself back, but what we all need to do is realzie that we need to watch our mouths and watch how we communicate. we are christians, and what is the point of a new student coming to youth group, and feeling like they are being judged, and being ridiculed, before anyone even knows them. in James 4 it even says, "who are you to judge your neighbor," i think that is a great question. where do we come off with the right to judge others, when the only real judge is God himself and he is going judge us for how we have lived our life.
taming the tongue.... its a hard thing to do sometimes, but it is necessary, for all of us to live by.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

ciy thoughts

so last week we went to a conference down in Tennessee. It was probably the 8th time i have been to ciy, and it was a very interesting week. There was a different vibe and feel to this week comparing it to the week that we went on last year. For some reason it just felt different, i think the main reason i felt that there was a different vibe, was because there was someone missing from the trip that has been there for a long time. the reason seems kind of weird, and in my mind some what awkward, but when there is someone there for that long of a time and things are done in the same way, change is a very scary and hard thing.
there were some hard times, great times, funny times, and lots of other times, but i think the best thing that came out of this week was that the group that went to ciy seemed to group together and form a cohesive group of students that all want too grow together and grow deeper than they ever have been before.
one of the things that i love about ciy is how much the week messes with people not only spiritually but physically and emotionally. There is always some weird drama, or weird happenings that always go down. this week, i think the largest drama factor was the fact that one person was not there. It created a weird vibe that made people act differently that i think they would have not been that way if someone else was there.
hey but that is ok, becuase i was feeling the same way. the weird thing is that it seems like not only did the vibe change, the way things were done changed. Im not saying that things were done bad, but it seemed like decisions could be harder than they should have been come time, because we wanted to make decisions as a group, and it became a time where people would butt heads more than we should. BUT THATS OK!
change is a hard thing to work through, and deal with especially when you are used to one person making decisions and being able to take the brunt of whatever is coming at the ministry.
change is a very hard thing to deal with, but the even harder part about change is the anticipation of who the next person will be. the next person could scare a lot of people especially if the new person is going to come in and change everything. I understand exactly how people are feeling, especially the people on this trip. the one thing that comes to my mind though, is that people need to learn that change is going to happen, anywhere you are in life. change is always going to be hard and change is always going to make you upset and act a little differently when it comes to not knowing how to react to change.
so change is hard, but i know what it is like to go through change, and i understand the emotion that comes with change. so for anyone that may read this, i want you to know that i want to help, and i want to care and talk to anyone who is having a hard time with this transition. i may not have all the answers but, i know that i can give enough hugs, or conversation about any of this crap that is going on.
i hope you take the offer, i'm ready
peace out.........

Saturday, June 21, 2008

swimming and campfire

swimming and campfires to me are to of the most relaxing yet satisfying things that i do in my life. some of the best time to connect with people your own age and maybe students or younger friends have happened around a campfire or while being in the pool.
a friend of mine was telling me about one our mutual friends who started a ministry in bar or pub like place out in seattle. Now to me that was the coolest idea to start a ministry in that kind of a setting.
so in the thought of pools and fires, why not start a small group, or just even maybe a group of people getting together and talking about deeper things in a pool or around a campfire?
i think that could be one of the most influential things is some peoples lives. it seems like most of the people that i hang out with around a campfire or in a pool, talk the whole time, why not make that time a growing and a learning time?

Friday, June 20, 2008

Summer Beginings

so i am in the third week of an internship that 7 weeks ago i didnt know existed for me to be apart of. Seriously! 7 weeks ago my life literally flipped upside down.

April 27- This was the morning i was planning on leaving for a week and half vacation in the UK with my family. as i was sitting on my girlfriends floor in her house waiting for her to get ready to go to the airport my phone rings. It was my brother, and i got super excited to talk to him since i was about ready to hang out with him for a week and half. " yo wat up brotha" is what i said to him, my brother didnt seem as enthused to talk to me. Whats wrong is all i could think about, katie dumped him, he got fired, i didnt know, but when i asked him i couldnt believe what he told me. My mentor, friend, one of my Paul's, was leaving. matt decided to go to Mountain Christian Church. Let me tell you something, i dont think i have ever felt my chest deflate in sadness so fast. as the conversation went on, my brother told me that kevin and brian were wanting to offer me an internship for the summer. what i didn't realize is that they would call literally 30 seconds after i hung up the phone with my brother. as i talked to kevin on the phone, i didn't really know what to think, i was just flowing with so many emotions. i was excited, sad, confused, upset, fearful, really anything you could think of, i was feeling it. as amanda was doing her hair, i walked up the stairs into her bedroom, and she immediately could tell that something was off. i told her the whole deal, and she just said " i guess we are going to philly".

may 5- i am back in st louis, after vacation and as we are driving back to school, i talk to a man named frank. frank is this guy at ccv that is an adult director, and he is going to be the guy overseeing the interns. i still had not said yes or no, but i was very highly considering it. frank put a lot of ease in my heart when i talked to him, he told me that he wanted me to make the decision that is best for me, and not for anyone else. now up to this point, no one has really said that to me, most people were just assuming that i was coming. frank put a lot of ease in my mind to make this decision for me and not for other people. frank in the end helped me make the right decision and that was to go to ccv and become a ccv intern.

june 25- even though we were in the car together for 19 hours, amanda and i were laughing, loving each other, having fun and we decided 15 hours into our trip to stop at ccv. we walk in to the church and we interupt the 5 oclock meeting. it was kind of funny. we hung out and said hello to some people, and then headed off back to my house. as we were driving to my house we were talking as well as myself thinking about the 3 that i would be working with this summer.

mj- mj seemed like she was going to be the task oriented, and organized one of the 3 of us. i was right on the money. she is exactly like that. i also was excited to see how she would speak and connect with the students and i was very excited to get to know her better since not really getting to when we first met. after 3 weeks of the internship, mj has been awesome, she has allowed myself and adam and april to be ourselves but has kept us on track and having us get stuff done.

april- haha, thats exactly what i thought. april is the girl that is always happy, and laughing and fun to be around. so that was what i was thinking. i was exactly right. she is awesome to have in the office, her encouragement, laughter, and just fun spirit, is awesome to have around. i am very excited for her talk and her growth this summer

adam- adam was one that i didnt know what to think about at first. he did an internship last summer with CIY, and that kind of intimidated me. i didnt know what to expect when it came to how adam and i would mesh together and whether or not we would butt heads with ideas or anything. let me tell you though, i was dead wrong. i love adam, he is fun, hillarious most of the time, we have a good time together and we work very well with each other. i am very excited about becoming closer friends and barnabi together.

by the way i just want to get this out there also. i love matt silver and his family. they mean a whole crap lot to me and i dont think i would be who i am and where i am today if i did not have them in my life. i miss them and love them, congrats on nathan, and i hope to see them soon. good luck silvers, i along with the other interns love you very much.

so three weeks in, i am pretty happy that i have made this decision, and i can not wait for what the rest of the summer will bring.

peace out..........